People Who Don't Want Help

Not everyone who tells you their problem(s) wants your help. Some of you would say, "What do you mean?", "That doesn't make sense!" etc....but, it is true.💁‍♀️

Some people,
- just want to vent, let out steam, release their frustrations
- manage their own problems better when they "talk it out", when they can "say it out loud enough to hear it for themselves".
- just want sympathy, or want you to know they have problems too, or want to build allies - ever heard: "misery loves company".
- just tell you their problems so you don't tell them yours or expect them to help you.
- don't want your help, they just want to test you. You respond - they say you have saviour-complex or you don't respond - they say you are mean spirited.
- are "happiest?" or most in their "element?" when they're talking about their problems and other people's problems....and being the center of attention.

So don't get upset over it. I have literally seen people work themselves up to a frenzy, get very upset or irritated they ruin their whole day, give themselves severe migraine.... because someone wouldn't accept or take the solution they're offering.

Once you understand the following...
1: that it is not about you (their refusal really has nothing to do with who you are) but more about who they are or, their level of understanding or, their inert character or, their level of perception or, their self-limiting-belief or general belief-system, or, their custom or culture, or their prejudice
2: that you cannot drink paracetamol for everyone's headache because you alone will suffer from the side effects
3: there's no satisfaction in forcing your help on someone who clearly needs it but doesn't want it
4: some people don't believe they deserve all the good things that life has in store for them, no matter what you say or do
5: some people are too scared of failing or making mistakes to even try, no matter what you say
6: some people are preconditioned to never accept help...or are too proud...or see accepting help as a sign of weakness or would see it as offensive if you offer to help
7: making someone do something they don't want can in the long run produce little or no satisfactory result(s)
8: you cannot force a connection
9: some people refuse to rise above past negatives or leave what they believe to be their comfort zone
10: they might not feel they can trust your solution (the solution you are providing)
11: they may have a fixed mindset and only see more problems for every solution you present.
12:
13: that you are not "Tequila", you can't make everyone happy
.....it becomes easier to let go.

Be like the river (water) and just flow. Walk away from people who refuse to see your worth, your light. Walk away from negative people - you cannot expect to live a positive life hanging out with one. Don't be afraid to lose the wrong people rather be afraid of losing yourself people-pleasing.

Focus your time and energy helping those "who want your help". You get a better resolution and you feel better inside.

Remember, even in nature,
- water does not fight obstacles....it just follows (flows) the path of least resistance or it pools and increases until it can flow right over the obstacle.
- wind does not fight obstacles....it just follows the path of least resistance (goes aroundtheobstacle) or it pools and increases until it has built enough force to clear (uproot with little or no energy) the obstacle and continue on its merry way.

Even if you think "it is stupid not to accept your help", or you think "their reason for not accepting the solution is idiotic or doesn't make sense" or you think "the person is stupid" .....don't argue....just let it go. It's their decision and right not to accept your help.

You don't have to UNDERSTAND it, you don't have to fight it, you just have to ACCEPT it. Let them come to you when they're READY.
Take it "out of your thoughts and out of your mind". Focus on the people who WANT your help/assistance/wisdom/solution. You - will - be - happier - for - it!😁💯.

Now, will this be easy for some to do?...NO. But will it be worth it?....ABSOLUTELY 😄

I will finish this post with this quote by Mark Twain — 'Never argue with stupid people. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.' Lots of love💕 from ObyGraceNneka 🙋🏽‍♀️